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Possible Duplicate:
What’s the coolest startup programmer job title?

A colleague at a company manufacturing fault-tolerant servers:

We sell computers that never break. I write the software that tells the customer it's broken.

A friend at a company doing security analysis of binary code:

I make people mad by generating a ton of false positives.

Much more colorful than "developer" or "engineer" or "code monkey". What's the best you've ever said or heard?

24 accepted

Saw in a blog, describing a spec writer:

My job is to translate specifications from one language to another with just enough accuracy to ensure that nobody questions my ability, but just enough inaccuracy to ensure that no one questions my necessity.

10

When people ask me what I do I tell them:

I get paid to sit in front of a computer and cuss at it.

9

I am some kind of magician - I can turn coffee into software.

6

At work I was dubbed the Paris Hilton of Developers. I'm still trying to figure out if it was a compliment or not.

5

I was once a "Software Specialist-Generalist" -- I have no idea what that means.

5

Back in the Internet boom days, I was allowed to pick my own job title, so I was the company's "Programmer Laureate"

For a while, my business cards called me a "Gentleman Programmer", but a few people though that was sexist, so I switch to "Simple Country Programmer".

My cards also state, "Will Program for Food".

4

It is not official, but I am known around the office as...

The Necessary Evil

4

"Highly Paid Typist"

3

Technically i'm the senior architect, but really, most of the time i just go get more water for the water cooler so i can lure people in to listen to my cool ideas.

3

"The Tech guy who's not in the IT Dept so is expected to do technical work without adequate control of technical resources".

That was too long, so it was shortened to "Turf Disturber".

3

"Hardware Wizard" and "Software Wizard". Definitely.

3

I was pushing for "Software Geek" at one point, then I moved to a new job with a small company that let us pick our own titles when they printed business cards, so I told them to put "Senior Software Geek" on mine.

There was apparently some mistake in printing, as when the cards arrived, they all said "Programmer".

2
  • Deep Ego-logicist

  • MAD (Macintosh Applications Developer)

  • SAD (Senior Applications Developer)

  • GLAD (Graphics Library/language Applications Developer)

  • SCARED (Senior Coder And Redundant E-commerce Developer)

  • Professional Bull5hitter

2

I was once known as the "Packet Sniffing Wienie"

(This was at a security software company that had two products, a server scanner and a packet monitor. I worked on the packet monitor, the scanner people used the above term to refer to me).

1

I've been known by many titles, the best two were:

  • Lord High Pooh-bah of Code
  • Software Philosopher

Too bad neither made it to business cards ... (And both were overstating my abilities by quite a bit!)

1

My boss once told me I was his crystal ball. Apparently anything that holds my interest for more than a month will be commercially significant within the year.

1

I joked to friends that I was a "Catastrophe Recovery Technician" at my last SysAdmin job. The catastrophes weren't my fault, but I was still the lucky one that got to deal with them most of the time.

1

"Professional byte arranger".

1

me?

"The Mine Clearer".

1

I've started describing my job to non-techie people as "Paid Geek"

1

Code Monkey. ooh ooh

1

I call myself a web mechanic. I don't build it, I fix it.

1

"I make the internets"

1

According to my wife: I go to work, have a morning coffee break, play squash at lunch, have an afternoon coffee break, and come home late.

0

I never had a terribly interesting job description, but a previous job title of mine was "Code Voodoo Specialist".

0

"voodoo programmer: i don't know why it works, it just does"

0

PC Witch Doctor

0

I call myself a Programming Ninja

When anyone at our workplace needs help, I just suddenly appear to help them out and then disappear almost immediately afterwards.

Note: I call myself a Programming Ninja. No one else seems to call me that, no matter how many times I say it.

sad ninja

0

I was an SFA at one job - officially Senior Facilities Analyst, but of course the initials also stood for Sweet F*** All

0

I'm a Software Philosopher

0

A former colleague: "CodeSmith and Keeper of the Way"

0

I solve people problems that they don't even know they had (web developer).

0

I've been called Atlas, for supporting all of my employer's software pretty much all by myself (about a dozen or so different programs and products, in a multitude of projects) .

0

When I worked on Smalltalk I had business cards with the title "Object Manipulator".